Esther Zuckerman
December 18, 2014 AT 02:44 PM EST

Though the circumstances around the Sony hack are very serious, the incident did give David Letterman the opportunity to lob some industry-focused one liners on The Late Show last night. 

The host decided to throw caution to the wind and read what he smirkingly claimed were the hacked emails. These emails, which Letterman claimed to have received by way of his “buddy” Carl, are essentially just some clever punchlines. Here are some of the best:

“Nicolas Cage said the script is terrible and he’s in.”

“If we get Morgan Freeman to narrate it won’t seem like crap.”

“The Inglourious Basterds theme park is a no-go.”

“For the role of Aretha Franklin we have offers out to Queen Latifah and Michael Cera.”

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