Silicon Valley’s Richard Hendricks (played by Thomas Middleditch) has some advice for you: Put your cell phone in a freezer.
Hendricks has “written” a guest blog for the real-life Pied Piper website, where he talks about how “we live in a dangerous time” that calls for increased security measures—hence the order to put your cell phone in “a lead-lined box in a freezer.”
“Vary your routes to and from work,” he adds in the incredibly paranoid blog post. “Ideally, daily polygraphs and invasive body searches for all employees.” Makes sense; after all, YOLO, right?
He goes on to address the paranoia directly: “A great man once said, ‘All paranoid fears have a basis in fact,’” he says. “I won’t tell you who, because I don’t know who is reading this or what advantage over me they might derive from that information.”