Nick Romano
February 20, 2016 AT 06:25 PM EST

No matter how many signatures are on that fan petition, Deadpool won’t host Saturday Night Live — and Ryan Reynolds‘ Merc with a Mouth has shared a profanity-filled video tirade revealing why. 

“Listen up, Lorne Michaels,” the character began, addressing the sketch comedy show’s creator. “SNL took my f–king Life of Pablo album without asking. Now I’m bummed. That and Rip Taylor — fake a–!” 

The rant spoofs the leaked audio of Kanye West purportedly making a similarly heated speech backstage when he recently guested as SNL‘s musical guest. Deadpool continued by claiming himself to be more influential than MC Hammer, the Kia Sorrento, Barbara Bush, The Muppets, and the iPhone 5, to name a few.

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“I’ve got the biggest opening rated R movie of all time. Are they f–king crazy?” Deadpool said, citing his film’s recent box office success. Watch the entire video above.

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