What’s more priceless than Robbie Williams sharing his real-life story of a sexual encounter with a creepy ending? Watching Justin Timberlake, Anna Kendrick, and Daniel Radcliffe react to the completely inappropriate tale as the cameras roll.
It all went down on the U.K.’s Graham Norton Show over the weekend, with Williams sharing graphic details of a sexual experience in a castle.
“Oh my God, I can’t believe I’m telling this, but I will,” Williams started off. “So back in the day, I was renting a castle… and we were renting it to rehearse in for a tour. And I was in this big room in this castle, I’d gone to sleep, and I woke up and I was lying on my bed and I was cognizant and I was awake but I hadn’t opened my eyes yet. And I was getting more and more confused because I could swear there was somebody in my room. And I could swear that they were sort of tidying up or cleaning or something.”
Williams was right. “Sure enough, I open my eyes,” he explained. “There was a lady at the bottom of the bed, and she could have been anywhere from 28 to 58.”
The musician said his confusion was confounded by the fact that she was listening to a portable cassette player in the age of CDs.
“She looks at me, and I look at her and I went, ‘All right.’ And she went, ‘All right.’ And she looked on the floor at where my underpants were and she went, ‘Calvin Kleins?’ And I went, ‘Yeah.’ She went, ‘P—-.'”
As Williams was thinking about how weird the situation was, the woman said to him, “Have you got morning glory?”
“This was back in the day when I used to have morning glory,” quipped Williams. “So I was like, ‘Yeah.’ She says, ‘I’ll wank you off.'”
That’s when Kendrick and Radcliffe totally lose it: The actress covers her face as laughter forces Radcliffe to bend over. Trying to process everything, Timberlake looks on with a bewildered smile, while Norton claps for Williams.
“So I’m a creative fella and I’m really young,” Williams recalled. “I can close my eyes and pretend it’s somebody else.”
He soon added: “So anyway, she does the dirty deed and it’s confusing and I felt defiled. And off she went on her merry way.”
Williams explained that he later found out from the castle manager that cleaners weren’t on staff. “It was just someone that walked off the street with a feather duster,” he said, causing Kendrick to freak out once again.
Since written words can’t begin to capture the ridiculousness of Williams’ experience, watch the clip below for the full story.