4:20 a.m. The crap dancer gushes in Kelly's ear momentarily about how big a fan she is, then returns to the dance floor. ''I feel like an a—-hole for making fun of her,'' says Kelly sullenly. ''She was really nice. She can't help it if she dances like a retard.''

4:45 a.m. Kelly heads home exhausted. Fatboy Slim never plays ''One Word'' (Sharon Osbourne can rest easy). But the next night, Junior Sanchez does, at Rokbar, where Kelly and friends dance till dawn. ''I was really excited,'' she later giggles. ''It was the first time I ever heard my record in a club.''


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