Harvey and Bob Weinstein, Miramax founders and perennial tabloid fodder, have reputations as big as any movie star: They're brassy and bossy, but have the Midas touch when mining for Oscar gold. But they deserve no applause for publishing this supposed ''tell-all'' novel The Twins of Tribeca by a former publicist, Rachel Pine. In it, naive movie lover Karen Jacobs lands her dream job at Glorious Pictures, run by bullying twin brothers, only to realize that a girl could lose her sparkle when she's constantly being screamed at. The dirt is thinly veiled, but anorexically thin: A Robert De Niro-ish character doesn't like to talk in elevators, a Gwyneth Paltrow type dresses up like a gangsta to seem less effete. As for our heroine, do we really care that she might miss her holiday plans to work on an Oscar campaign?