BRITNEY AND KEVIN
''Britney was literally my next-door neighbor. I've always had a lot of compassion for her. And even for Kevin. I think she just wants to be loved and, you know, he's like me 15 years ago. I gave him all the warnings I could. I said, 'Listen, I've been there, you guys have gotta be careful.' You know, they look at me like an old guy, you know, 'Whatever.'''

ROSEANNE'S FAMED NATIONAL ANTHEM RENDITION
''Where I grew up, if this is your wife, then goddamn it, you're always on her f---ing side. Now, I told her to record that song in advance. I warned her. I said, 'You should rehearse.' She didn't listen to me. But who in the world is going to comfort her besides me, her husband? That's my job.''

Originally posted Jul 22, 2005 Published in issue #831 Jul 29, 2005 Order article reprints
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