Oprah won't return your calls. Neither will George Clooney or Harvey Weinstein. But at least you can dial their offices direct, thanks to Gerard Jones. The rabble-rouser's everyonewhosanyone.com has phone numbers and e-mail addresses for more than 6,000 showbiz notables whether they like it or not. And many of them don't like it. The site, launched as a marketing tool in 2002 when Jones was shopping his novel, Ginny Good (published by Monkfish), ''encourages would-be screenwriters to inundate our executives with unsolicited submissions, spam, and phone calls,'' wrote lawyers for Universal in October. The studio is pressuring the company that hosts the URL, Dotster, to close EWA. ''I got all the info from Google and other search engines,'' says Jones. ''Shut them down.'' As the tussle continues, likely with no sanctions against the site, Jones, 63, predicts one possible ending: ''I'll die at some point.''