Backdoored Man

So now you're headed to the sequester house. What does it look like?
I'm not allowed to talk about it, but you know how spoiled I am. No matter how good looking it is, it's not going to be good enough. I'm gonna be like, ''I hate those sconces!''

Since you're the first person on the jury. Is there anyone you're not going to vote for to win?
I could give you entire list — it's everyone left in the house with the exception of Erika and Danielle. Well, I'm going to give everyone their shot and listen to what they say. I don't like the game Dr. Ill is playing. I don't like the game Mike Booger is playing. I don't like that Chicken George maintained this ''I'm floating and getting far'' thing. I don't like that Janelle put me in danger. I don't like that Howie is an abrasive bully. But if they make it to the final two, they got there somehow.

Anyone you kind of want to see win?
I'd like to see the buxom blonde win — Janelle. She came in with the four people in an alliance, made an alliance with me, nominated Diane out of the blue, put the entire house on cold water and cots, put two people in her alliance on slop, and flirted with Will within an inch of her life to the point where she doesn't know if she has a boyfriend on the outside. This is the riskiest game in Big Brother history.

It's funny to hear you say all that because you were harsh on her in the diary room. You picked on her roots, her personality. You called her fat.
When did I call her fat? Oh, no, I said I wasn't going to do that this time. That's why I spent so much time alone. I don't know, after living with the Sovereign Six, I feel like calling up the Nerd Herd and apologizing to them. I think those people made those other people hate them. I think Howie's bad behavior made them hate him. I could say the same thing about Janelle and the Iraqi peach. He was no peach. He was a little depressed; he always seemed angry. If people weren't behaving like he wanted, he seemed angry.

I thought you loved Kaysar.
One thing I'm saddest about was something I said about him in passing that got bastardized. He's one of those people who's so good looking, kind, charismatic. He's the Muslim Virgin. If you get to the end versus him — I don't care how good your game is — you're going to lose. You can't beat him. There's a halo around him. That got bastardized to say I don't want a good person to win. That's not what I said. Playing Big Brother is about picking the right person to get to the end with.

Which is why I think it's crazy people want to vote out Janelle and Howie. Anyone can win against them.
Why on earth do you think I was trying to tie my wagon to Janelle? That's the person to take to the end. The other person is Will. But you can't take Will away from Mike Boogie. You tie your wagon to Janelle and you're $500,000 richer.

So why is everyone so stupid?
Because this isn't All-Stars. This is Preschool Brother. It's the craziest season I've ever seen. These are basic concepts.

Do you think Janelle wanted you out and was lying to you, or did she really want you to stay? I know the answer, but I'm not allowed to tell you.
No. She wasn't genuine in wanting me to stay. The thing about deals is once you make the deal, if the deal goes sour, you have to figure out a way to get out of the deal. One of the things Janelle said to me was ''My alliance wants to put you up, but I don't want to.'' I was like, ''What? I'm supposed to be closer to you than your alliance. I'm going to vote them out for you. That's part of the deal.'' When she said that, I knew she wanted out of the deal.

Anything else you have suspicions about that may or may not be going on inside the house?
I think James is in bed with Chill Town, and that's smart. He's the low man on the totem pole with the other four. I was the town crier since week one about Chill Town, but nobody wanted to hear it. I certainly wanted to do Mike Boogie, but doing Mike Boogie is very different than giving him the game.

Really? Mike over Will?
I don't find Will that attractive. He's charismatic. He's good looking. But I don't like too attractive. I like imperfect because I want to be the cute one.

Interesting.
But by the end I was in love with James, physically in love with him. He tries to be this Baby Will, but he was so adorable with how much he loves Sarah. James spent a lot of time alone in the yellow room, and I spent a lot of time alone in the red room. We would have these moments like, ''I can't believe we're here.'' And he showed me his butt one time, and it was the cutest thing I've ever seen.