Flirting With Disaster

What was up with your oddly colored hair this past week?
I was growing a goatee, and I didn't shave. Danielle and Erika said, ''You look good with facial hair.'' Not Janie — she never really likes my physical appearance. I shaved and made a goatee. Then the day before, we got the notion it was going to be a prom. So Georgie, Dr. Will, and Boogie put streaks in my hair. It was kind of accidental, but I got a new hairstyle.

Wait a minute. You let George, Will, and Boogie do your hair?
Once again, I put my trust in the untrustworthy. I should have known right then and there I was going home. They were going to do the eyebrows too until Danielle said not to.

So was it nice to see Marcellas at the evictee house?
I saw Marcellas the second I walked in. He was playing cards. We watched a couple of tapes of the HOHs and the power-of-veto ceremonies. I cursed out everyone who planned my demise, and he wasn't happy about that because he's still friends with Boogie and Erika. He was offended. But it's a big house. Lots of grounds. A big beach. I don't see him except meals — lunch and dinner. No biggie. I was never really friends with Marcellas before Big Brother or in the house, so I couldn't really care less. He's a bunch of negative annoying energy.

You seemed to be kissing all the girls every two seconds. Did you have an in-house romance we didn't see? Perhaps a little Boogie-Erika type thing?
I'll be honest with you. Erika dressed up early in the game like Princess Leia, like, ''I like Jedis.'' But [unkind remarks about Erika redacted]. If there was one person I wanted to get it on with, it would be Alison or possibly Diane. You're locked in this house, and it's like, ''This is what the menu is.'' This is who I have to harass, annoy, hit, flirt with. Whether it's comical or not, I had a lot of fun doing it. Usually it gets a big laugh when I say, ''Hey I love your boobies,'' or ''Let's go to the red room together.'' It's part of my personality. It's an extension of who I am.

Do you have a favorite Howie moment of this season?
Riding on the Slip n' Slide with Chicken George, walking around in my birthday suit for Boogie, mimicking sexual gestures to the house, my overall interaction with people. I don't have to say anything, and it can still be pretty funny. I can walk around or put on some clothing, and the house dies because it's so hysterical.

What was more fun for you: BB6 or BB: All-Stars?
I had way more fun last season. Last year I competed in two power of vetos before I got evicted. This year they never went more than five minutes, and they were more about how can we degrade this person or who can get this trip quickest. They're making you earn your money this year. Any Super Bowl champion is going to tell you the first was the sweeter one.

What do you do outside Big Brother?
I was selling pharmaceuticals before BB6 and studying to be a meteorologist. Then I became a quasi celebrity, so to speak. A lot of people were asking for my autograph, like, ''Hey, it's Big Brother Howie!'' I went to a charity event last year in Vegas for Hurricane Katrina, and I was there with Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, Jessica Biel, Kathy Griffin. A lot of people knew me. It was kind of cool. I sold light sabers. I made some money. Can you put on my website? It's howiegordon.com, If people want to chat with me after I come out of sequester. I live with a friend of the family in a suburb in California. I have a nice view of the pool. I also want to go back into meteorology. People ask me if I'm going to start acting, and acting's not really my thing, but we'll see. Maybe I'll try to get back on TV shows to do more reality.

What show do you want to tackle next?
I think I'd be a great Bachelor. I was on Blind Date and Elimidate. I'd say, ''You're too ugly for me,'' or ''You're too loud for me.''

Do you think people want to see you on another show?
I'm truly made for reality television. I'm the greatest person made for reality television.