''It's amazing. He tastes just like Jeffrey Tambor.''
''BLOB'' HOMER SIMPSON, AFTER EATING DR. PHIL MCGRAW, ON THE SIMPSONS
''Here's some advice I wish I woulda got when I was your age: Live every week like it's Shark Week.''
TRACY (TRACY MORGAN), ON 30 ROCK
''It's hard to soar like an eagle when you're surrounded by turkeys.''
ADAM, DISCUSSING HIS LOSER TRIBE, ON SURVIVOR: COOK ISLANDS
''Attention shoppers! We're having a special today on not getting shot, but it's only available at the back of the store!''
CAROLYN (LAURIE METCALF), ON DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES
''Bob Barker [is] retiring from The Price Is Right. Barker said, 'I realized I was getting too old when I started watching The Price Is Right.' ''
CONAN O'BRIEN, ON LATE NIGHT
''McDreamy is doing the McNasty with McHottie? That McBastard!''
GEORGE (T.R. KNIGHT), TRYING TO TALK LIKE CRISTINA (SANDRA OH), ON GREY'S ANATOMY
''Is there any reason why your head looks like a pigeon?''
PROFESSIONAL DANCER KARINA SMIRNOFF, TO HER PARTNER, MARIO LOPEZ, ON DANCING WITH THE STARS