Dear Diary: James has really been sending me mixed messages lately. I'm so confused! For years he's churned out dependably formulaic thrillers like ''Kiss the Girls'' and ''Along Came a Spider.'' Then he writes Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas, a gooey romance. Just who does he think he is, Nicholas Sparks? Mr. Sensitive cannot honestly believe that I'd buy his story. A poet mysteriously dumps his girlfriend. All he leaves her with is a diary written by his wife to their young son. Is he an adulterer? Is his wife even alive? Does tragedy loom? And, jeez, James is just sooo manipulative, shamelessly pandering to his new female fans: ''Working mothers, mothers who stay at home, single mothers -- they are all so amazing.'' It's over between us, and I mean it this time.


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