Disc Jockey

TUBE TALK In a week whose two biggest television events were commercial-free collaborations among multiple broadcast and cable networks, NBC won the Nielsen ratings race for most-watched prime time show on a technicality. President Bush's 40-minute speech on Thursday drew 82.1 million viewers across nine channels, but only NBC included commercials in the 20 minutes of news analysis that followed. Since Nielsen only rates commercial programming, it considered that 20 minutes the most watched show of the week, drawing 23.9 million viewers. Similarly, while Friday's telethon ''America: A Tribute to Heroes'' drew an average of 59.3 million viewers across some 35 channels, its lack of commercials meant Nielsen did not rate its performance on individual networks.

Overall, Nielsen gave the skewed week to ABC, with an average of 11.1 million viewers tuning in to such fare as the Miss America pageant and the season premiere of ''The Practice.'' CBS was second with 10.5 million viewers, followed by NBC (9.8 million), Fox (7.2 million), UPN (4.3 million) and the WB (2.7 million)....

Bill Maher continues to face trouble for his politically incorrect remarks on last week's ''Politically Incorrect'' -- this time, from the White House. Maher said that it was wrong to call the hijackers ''cowards'' since they were daring enough to fly suicide missions, and that the U.S. practice of bombing Middle Eastern targets from a safe distance miles away was much more cowardly. Maher has apologized repeatedly for the comments, saying he meant to criticize politicians and not soldiers, but he has not been forgiven by two major sponsors, Sears and Procter & Gamble, which have dropped their ads from the show, or from the seven ABC affiliates that have stopped airing ''PI.'' Now, Maher's been scolded by White House press secretary Ari Fleischer, even though Fleischer admitted yesterday that he had not seen the show in question or read the transcript. ''Assuming the press reports are right, it's a terrible thing to say, and it's unfortunate,'' he said. ''There are reminders to all Americans that they need to watch what they do, and this is not a time for remarks like that; there never is.''

ON BROADWAY The return of ticket buyers to New York's theater district has been gradual. Long-running musicals that cater to tourists, like ''Les Miserables'' and ''Phantom of the Opera,'' are doing better than last week but still playing to a fraction of their capacity. Five shows closed last week, and ''The Music Man'' is in danger of joining them. Others have seen their casts and crews swallow pay cuts of 25 to 50 percent to keep the shows running.

To boost attendance, the Broadway community is uniting to shoot a promotional video. The cast of every current show will appear in costume and sing ''New York, New York'' at the shoot, which will take place Friday in Times Square. Some 100 Broadway performers past and present, including Nathan Lane, Matthew Broderick, Bernadette Peters, Bebe Neuwirth, Susan Lucci, Valerie Harper, Molly Ringwald, and Tony Roberts, gathered on Tuesday to record the vocal track.