TUBE TALK Given all the big-name movie directors shooting commercials to air during the Super Bowl, the game is starting to look like a tiny trip to the multiplex. Besides Joel and Ethan Coen's spot for H&R Block, the scheduled ads are expected to include a Killian's beer commercial by Michael Bay (''Pearl Harbor''), a Dockers ad by Christopher Guest, and two anti-drug spots by ''American History X'''s Tony Kaye (Paid for by the White House Office of National Drug Control Policy, the anti-drug ads will cost $3.4 million in commercial time, the most the government has ever spent on a single ad buy.) Plus, there'll be teasers for summer movies from every major studio except, curiously, 20th Century Fox, corporate sibling of the Fox TV network, where Sunday's game is airing....
Selma Blair's sex scene in the new film ''Storytelling'' is apparently so raunchy that, not only can it not be seen in American prints of the film (director Todd Solondz covered much of the action with a big red block in order to keep the film from earning an NC-17 rating), but Blair can't even discuss it on MTV. ''Total Request Live,'' the show where Backstreet Boys came clean about A.J. McLean's alcoholism, and where the cast of ''American Pie 2'' promoted a movie in which Jason Biggs glues his hand to his penis, booked Blair, who has appeared on MTV many times to promote such films as ''Cruel Intentions.'' She was to appear on Tuesday, but Monday night, ''TRL'' producers saw a tape of ''Storytelling,'' then called her Tuesday morning to cancel her guest spot. ''Once we had the opportunity to watch it, we decided that the film's content was not appropriate for the TRL audience,'' an MTV spokesperson said. Blair will be invited back in March, however, to promote her film ''The Sweetest Thing.''...
Morton Downey Jr. is returning to TV, as the subject of a biopic, aptly titled ''Loudmouth.'' Developed in consultation with Downey before he died of lung cancer last year, the TV movie would trace the rise and fall of his talk show, which was short-lived (1987-89) but influential (Chris Matthews and Bill O'Reilly are unimaginable without his example). The producers' wish list to star as the combative host includes Steve Buscemi, Dylan McDermott, Bill Paxton, Ray Romano, and Will Ferrell. Hey, how about Robert Downey Jr.? He's almost got the right name.
CURTAIN CALL Yo! Are you ready for ''Rocky: The Musical''? That's one of the shows that could be coming to Broadway under a new initiative launched by MGM. Following the trail blazed by Disney, which turned its ''Beauty and the Beast'' and ''The Lion King'' into long-running stage hits, MGM is digging into its film library (with 4,100 titles, it's the largest in the industry) to develop plays based on such back-catalog favorites as the ''Pink Panther'' movies, ''Marty,'' and ''Moonstruck.'' (Of course, MGM was known for its lavish movie musicals from the 1930s to the 1950s, but the rights to most of those have been long sold off.) Bet you can't wait for the musical version of ''Hannibal.''
Also, get ready for ''I Dream of Jeannie: The Musical.'' Series creator Sidney Sheldon, who's also producing a ''Jeannie'' feature film, is developing a Broadway version as well.
Another unlikely source for a musical: the life of Navy SEAL-turned-wrestler-turned-actor-turned-Minnesota Governor Jesse Ventura. Librettist and lyricist Stephen Dolginoff is writing ''The Body Ventura,'' with hopes of staging the show on Broadway. The outspoken politician has been relating the details of his life to Dolginoff, who has turned them into songs with such titles as ''The Heart Is a Muscle,'' ''You're Different,'' ''Hooyah,'' ''Take the World By Storm,'' and ''Do You Like the Rolling Stones?''...
