Hit List

Hit List

The 10 hottest topics for the week of March 2, 2007

Scott Brown's Hit List

1 Ricky Martin flips off Bush In Puerto Rico, locals tell me, this is a gesture of respect. And if it's not, I am never going back there.

2 Flight attendant claims sex with Harry Potter villain Ralph Fiennes He was all like, ''Say my name!'' and she was all like, ''He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named!''

3 Donald Trump challenges Vince McMahon to wrestle Two great fakes who fake great together.

4 Beyoncé shocked news of her swimsuit-issue pics didn't leak Maybe she should've taken out an ad on some celebutante's panty-less inner thigh.

5 Michael Richards skips mock trial It's a blow for mock trials, which haven't had a success since Ms. Dix's fifth graders got Eichmann off on a technicality.

6 Oscar producer wants fewer thank-yous To this end, the orchestra will be replaced with a howitzer.

7 Customs searches Sylvester Stallone's jet, according to Aussie paper Found: suspiciously high levels of irony and nostalgia.

8 Vanessa Williams goes nude in Allure Whatevs. Anyone will get nude for Allure. But I only drop trou for 'Redbook.'

9 Alleged Chinese Democracy track leaks Jesus, newly returned, says it's ''not a revelation,'' adding, ''See what I did there?''

10 The Fly to be an opera They say it's aerodynamically impossible for Pavarotti to fly. But because he doesn't know that...he soars.

Originally posted Feb 23, 2007 Published in issue #923 Mar 02, 2007 Order article reprints
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