Emmys Backstage: Stars Get Sassy

Robert Duvall couldn't remember the first Western he'd seen (he thinks it starred Gary Cooper, which really narrows it down) and Helen Mirren expounded on the already well-reported story that she declined an audience with the Queen because she was off working (or something). Still, plenty of fireworks ignited when the winners met the press backstage at the Emmys. Here's a recap.

IT'S...POTTY TIME?
Terry O'Quinn, first-time winner as a supporting actor on Lost, started things with a foreboding comment: ''Did you see how many [Emmy statuettes] are [backstage]? It's going to be a long night.'' Backstage, O'Quinn continued the easygoing spirit he brought to his acceptance speech, explaining that the only thing running through his head while the nominees were announced was, ''As soon as this award is over, I can go to the bathroom.''

UNLEASHING HIS INNER ARI
''When people meet me, they're very bored with me,'' contended Jeremy Piven, who won for his supporting role on Entourage for the second straight year. ''I am just a softie character actor from Chicago.'' Well, he's got the softie part right; Piven responded to almost every reporter's query with ''That's a great question,'' and he began his time backstage by discussing the emotional journey of Ari Gold, the hard-bitten agent he plays on the show, and the inspiration of his late actor father. But then Piven tossed out this random aside: ''I'm the only straight man to bring his mother [to the Emmys] four times, and then his sister. You can look that up.'' It was all downhill from there. A reporter asked Piven if it was weird to win for the summer 2006 season of Entourage; after a beat, the actor responded with a wry smile, ''I would receive something for something I did in junior high school, and take a victory lap, and do a press conference. Do you understand what actors are?'' As the press room laughed, Piven took another beat, then mumbled into the mic, ''That's the only thing that'll come out of this [Q&A] session. Damn it. I was being so sensitive.'' Well, that, and he did leave the press room with this random factoid: His sister is married to Talladega Nights director (and father to Internet sensation Pearl) Adam McKay.

WHEN OSCAR MET EMMY...
You knew Current TV honcho Al Gore, who won Outstanding Creative Achievement in Interactive TV, wasn't in Washington anymore when the first question he got backstage was about what he might have to offer Britney Spears. Fortunately, like the seasoned politician he is, Gore expertly evaded responding (and, by the way, no, he doesn't plan to run for President in 2008). Indeed, Gore was in top form. Asked if, now that he has an Oscar and an Emmy, he will go for a Tony, he merely chuckled and said, ''Thank you very much!'' When The Tonight Show's cookie lady, Marjorie Johnson, asked the former Vice President if he wanted any of her ginger snaps, he smiled and nodded and didn't commit. It was only when a reporter pointed out that the press room was devoid of fluorescent bulbs that Gore's inner environmentalist finally came out of hiding. ''I think they're using LEDs back here,'' he said after checking out the lights. ''I know that kind of sounds like a geek or a wonk, but I know that's a step ahead of the compact fluorescent.'' Ahhh. Nice to know some things never change.

SHARING THE LOVE
The night's biggest winner, Tony Bennett, was truly feeling the love backstage — and spreading it around. Standing with his entire Emmy-winning team, the Tony Bennett: An American Classic star praised his special's helmer, Rob Marshall, as the ''best director I've ever worked with'' — to which Marshall responded, ''That's my Emmy right there, thank you, Tony.'' And Marjorie the Cookie Lady struck again, asking Bennett, ''Do you like older women?'' Bennett's priceless reply: ''Only when I have Viagra.''

NEXT PAGE: ''I would've liked to have said more bleeped-out words, but that's life.''