Depressing Engagements

Moving on to our other ridiculous engaged couple of the episode, we have Jason and Katja (whose name is, according to Jason, pronounced ''Kasha''). Thanks to a friend of mine who found a blog with Katja's Facebook profile on it, we now know she's only 19 and has conservative political views. That said, it doesn't add up that she would rush into getting engaged to someone who, of all things, just finished rehab.

It also doesn't add up that Lauren would have no idea that Jason even had a girlfriend up until their lunch date. (He later said he'd been dating Katja for six months and ''some odd change.'') Plus, aren't relationships generally frowned upon when you're in recovery? The face Lauren made when Jason said, ''Yeah, we're going to move in together,'' was absolutely priceless. (Rewatch it again for proof!) Almost as priceless as the face she made at Jason's housewarming party when some dude named Brandon — amid a keg and a Bob Marley poster — announced Jason's engagement. It was very mature of Lauren to stick around instead of running outside and crying (which, let's be honest, is what most of us would've done in the same situation).

It was immature of Jason, on the other hand, to immediately bombard Lauren about the engagement and say, ''I know you don't like her.'' Um, Jason, she's known Katja for practically as long as you have. How can you expect her to have any sort of opinion (you know, other than one about how absurd you're being)? Plus, I never once saw Katja even attempt to be nice to Lauren, except maybe when they were introduced, and even then Katja was busy giving her the evil you're my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, and I know everything about you stare.

Thank goodness Whitney was around to offer Lauren some useful advice when she expressed concerns about having to pick up the pieces for Jason again. ''Don't let yourself be that person,'' Whitney told her. ''Maybe the best thing is to not talk to him for a while and let him fall down and let him pick himself back up.''

Whitney always seems to have the right thing to say at just the right time. If only she could've used that power on Elias, the member of the band the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus who refused to put on a different pair of jeans at a Teen Vogue photo shoot. Whitney, poor thing, was so hungover from partying with the band the night before at — shocker! — a dive bar called the Dime (seriously, I was ecstatic to see the ladies go somewhere else besides Les Deux) that she didn't even have enough energy to fight back with the stubborn musician over his wardrobe. Lisa Love thought it was irresponsible; I thought it was hilarious.

Okay, TV Watchers, let me know your thoughts: How tall do you think Lauren's shoes were in the last scene? Can we rename Beavis — at least until he shaves his facial hair? How about the Abominable Snowman? How long do you think Jason and Katja's engagement will last? Finally, are you with me on the Lauren, don't hook up with Brody ever again train?

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