''I've played, like, what I think is, like, a pretty, like, honorable game,'' said the woman who purposely threw an immunity challenge and then got mad at a tribe member for not trying hard enough in a reward one. But that's Peih-Gee for you — a walking inconsistency. She fancied herself a hardcore gamer but then sat and sulked when she wasn't invited to the Great Wall of China. She got into arguments with practically everyone at one point or another, but then claimed at tribal council in this week's episode that she didn't like Negative Nancys because ''I am one of those positive people.'' This comment elicited an obscene amount of incredulous looks, eye rolling, and flat-out laughter, both on screen and on my couch.
I don't mean to completely dis and dismiss Peih-Gee because she provided some great moments this season and also was a fierce competitor in the challenges. The woman fought to stay there as long as possible, and I totally respect that. I'd rather have that than someone who packs up and walks gently into that good night. But damn if she doesn't have a distorted view of herself. Not that she didn't have a reason to be down. At the reward challenge last night she was only given one arrow (by Courtney) to shoot off her Chinese crossbow. Of course, Denise was only given two, yet still won thanks to Courtney's obscenely off-target firing — with 11 of her 12 arrows — that gave Denise five extra points.
But then things just got downright embarrassing for our girl. After Denise picked Courtney to go with her to the Great Wall, Probst said she could pick one more. Todd and Amanda both looked like little puppy dogs pleading for a bone, but their pleading was nothing compared to Peih-Gee, who tried to both bribe and guilt-trip Denise into picking her. ''I'm gonna be on the jury, girl'' (there's the implied bribe: You bring me if you want my vote). ''I gave you Shaolin monks. I gave you food when I knew you were sick'' (and there's the guilt trip).
Neither worked. After Denise picked Todd, Peih-Gee decided to keep complaining to Probst. ''I took Denise on a great reward, I gave her Shaolin monks. I took her because I knew she was sick. And, like, I've been friendly to her from the very beginning, and she just doesn't care.'' For a second I thought that Peih-Gee had switched bodies with my daughter, Violet, in some sort of Mark Burnett-engineered Freaky Friday madness (hey, anything for ratings!), because Peih-Gee sure as hell did sound like a whiny four-year-old. Actually, come to think of it, not even my daughter whines that much.
Outside of this boo-hoo, woe-is-me crap, we actually had a fair amount of nice strategy talk that ultimately amounted to nothing. At reward, Todd talked about getting rid of Amanda, and back at camp, Amanda discussed getting rid of Todd. Then the reward trio returned, and Denise made a point of telling Amanda how Todd ate food on the plane he was supposed to bring back for her at camp. Not really sure why he did this since he and Courtney spent a fair amount of time criticizing their elaborate meal.
Speaking of meals, who's ready for some balut? Not Denise! She foiled Todd's plan a few months back at the food-immunity challenge when she couldn't put down the partially formed bird fetus, and then barely even tried to eat it last night on a second go-round. Maybe it's because it reminds her of some cafeteria dishes she's served as a lunch lady. Who knows, but she raised the white flag pretty damn quick. ''Denise, after 36 days and a 1-in-4 shot, you're not even trying,'' observed Probst. ''A million-dollar balut in front of you.'' I don't know how accurate that is because I honestly think Denise has about as much chance of winning this game as Gabe Kaplan, and I'm not even sure if Gabe Kaplan is still alive. (I lost track of the former Sweathog teacher some time around his appearance in the 1984 TV movie The Hoboken Chicken Emergency. And I know you think I just made that title up, but I didn't.)
Always positive Peih-Gee almost won immunity again but was bested by Amanda in the last section of the challenge (which featured scantily clad chicks wielding machetes — finally! It's about time. Thank you, Survivor!). This meant Peih-Gee needed to work more on the other contestants to try to stick around. It also gave Todd ample opportunity to work in his weekly proclamation about how if the other contestants had half a brain, they would get rid of him, as if he is some sort of Survivor Svengali who will wreak havoc on all mankind unless he is stopped by some clearly inferior underlings.
NEXT: Fittest of the Survivors
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