Gold Watches

Survivor, Dec. 6. Denise and friends go on the family-member reward outing

Denise won and had to pick two other pairs to join her and her hubby on a boat-ride feast, where she got a call from her children. (I'd make fun of her kids for crying so much on the phone, but frankly, I'd bawl like a baby too if my mother abandoned me for 39 days to go eat partially formed bird fetuses on the other side of the world.)...As if they weren't grumpy enough, the three back at camp had to deal with the other three returning with their loved ones. Now, here's a little tip for all you loyal readers out there — if you ever want to make an awkward situation even more awkward, simply stick out your fingers and say this: ''I don't know if you guys want to lick our hands, but would you like a little taste?'' Because how exactly do you respond to a query like that? Okay, granted, there was chocolate caked on the hands — at least I sincerely hope and pray that was chocolate — but still, inviting people to lick your fingers is still kinda nasty. I mean, it's not like these people are showering or anything. And need I also mention that Amanda is the one constantly using said fingers to shove odd body parts back into her bikini? — Dalton Ross