''The Office': Friday Night Fever

While I preferred Michael's club-scene story line to the parking lot subplot, there were more than a few priceless moments and revelations while the gang was in lockdown. First, we all know Toby is in love with Pam. And last night, after some blushing and inappropriate knee touching, the truth was really out. I hope Toby was kidding about moving to Costa Rica, because I think his crush on Pam is cute, and his interaction with Michael is always hilarious. I think it's the way Michael says his name, as if Toby didn't even deserve the privilege of a name. I hope ''Costa Rica'' is code for ''gay-cation,'' and that Toby will be back in a few weeks. I doubt Toby would ever go for it with Pam, because he'd never fight for something he loves. I mean, I have to turn the volume all the way up and put the closed captioning on just to understand what he's mumbling. But, wow, can that guy scale a fence or what?

I also enjoyed the vote proposed by Andy. Who's the better couple? Jim and Pam, or Andy and Angela? Andy and Angela had the majority vote. Stanley, Kelly, Kevin, Phyllis, Oscar...actually everyone except Creed voted for Angy. I'm with Creed on this one, even if he didn't vote because he doesn't believe in democracy. Even Andy admitted that being with Angela was ''a lot more chain than ball lately, if you know what I'm saying.'' Meredith probably would have changed her mind if she hadn't been busy getting hit in the face with a ball. How many parking-lot injuries can one alcoholic sustain? After tonight, Pam and Jim really need to do some damage control. And Leatherhead Jim should really teach his best girl how to throw a football.

''Back to the future,'' Michael wasn't scoring with any girls. Probably because his anecdotes included (1) the time he almost got a tattoo on his ''back'' that also referenced his way of looking ahead ''into the future'' and his second-favorite movie and (2) his job as a ''bank teller'' (which is in the impressive field of finance). He didn't come away from the night empty-handed though. He got some cell-phone pix of Dwight making out, and he learned the importance of having good friends: ''A famous person once said, 'Boys on the side.' But I don't. I disagree. I say, 'Let's hear it for the boys.' '' And that, bros and sexy preschoolers, was a Michael Scott-ism for the books.

Tonight's lessons:

· Never accept drinks from beautiful women. You never know what's in them.

· Always know the name of the African American guy who runs building security.

· Do not assume that the cleaning crew speaks Spanish, even if it turns out they do.

· Weevils are ruthless creatures that can destroy a perfectly good beet crop.

· Drugs are like weevils of the mind. You'll think you're having fun, then you'll start rambling about jungle warfare, then you'll wake up, naked, spooning Dwight. For further information about drugs, see The Wire.

So, what'd you think of last night's episode? How do you feel about Ryan's playboy ways? What would Michael's Saturday-workday theme be if it wasn't Scrambled Egg Saturday? And what's his favorite movie? And when can we meet Mrs. Scott?

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