1 Letterman moving to L.A.?
Are you ready for ''Stupid Pet Tricks, 90210''?
2 Picket Fences ban
A Mormon-owned TV station refuses to air it. No fair. We had to watch the Osmonds.
3 Oscar nominations
If you saw The Crying Game, you know who should get the Best Actor award.
4 Jodie Foster
She's suddenly sexy. It's the Richard Gere costar effect: Good things happen when you rub him.
Let's get real. George Washington and Thomas Jefferson could have slaves, but Kimba Wood can't hire Mary Poppins?
6 The Temp
An evil cutthroat who will stop at nothing to get ahead joins the office. So, what's the twist?
7 J. Nancy Hoover
The not-so-attractive head of the FBI in a dress? Maybe he should have been called ''The Untouchable.''
8 Homeward Bound
Two dogs and a cat can make a harrowing trip across the country. Yet at home they won't cross the street to go to the bathroom.
9 The Vanishing
Where'd it go?
10 Dinosaur rock
New records from old fogies McCartney and Jagger? No wonder they call it pop music.
11 Shaquille O'Neal
It's Gaelic for ''basketball.''
12 The swimsuit issue
If being next to naked is so much fun, how come they never do a jockstrap issue?
13 GM trucks
They think they have a handle on the problem. Driver's-side ejection seats.
14 Wildlife conservations parks
What we used to call zoos. The change was made by people we now call nincompoops.
15 Taster's Choice, the novel
You've seen the commercial, now read the book I Love You, But You Keep Me Up at Night.