Audrina's second "bad girl" act of the night happened at the very end of the episode, when she and J. Bobby hung out by her pool. "You can go in, and I can watch," he said to her in a very degrading way. Then, just as she undressed, he pushed her into the pool, only adding to my (continual) disgust toward him. "If you take your top off and went over there, I'd probably have to chase you," he teased. So what does she do? Oh, she takes her top off. Never mind that some of you horndogs out there are probably still rewinding this scene, isn't she a little ashamed to have done that on national TV? (Thank God blurry circles didn't need to be used.) I just hope she was drunk because this was not a romantic evening to remember. Her attempt at being a seductress just made her look like an idiot because while she was floating around naked in the pool, Justin Bobby was cackling about getting to "use his hall pass" in Cabo. And by hall pass, we all know he meant that despite Audrina, he can — and most likely, will — hook up with whomever he wants without any consequences.
Taking all of the above into consideration, it's going to be very interesting to see what goes down in next week's episode when a group — including Audrina, Lauren, Corey, and Justin Bobby — heads to Cabo for Brody's birthday. Yeah, about that — during some pool party in Malibu (where do these people get the money to afford such gorgeous houses?!?), Frankie mentioned to Lauren that Brody had invited Justin Bobby to Cabo. And Lauren, of course, was all concerned because she'd noticed how really happy Audrina was around Corey and didn't want anything to get in the way of that. Frankie made it clear that J.B. is one of the homies now, so all parties involved are going to have to suck it up. I'm still wondering: How are all these guys in one giant bromance (if you will) with each other? Remember when Heidi was dating Jordan (yes, in the cherished days before Spencer slithered along), and he and Jason Wahler hung out for what seemed like 24/7? There's just no way these dudes are all voluntarily buddy-buddy with each other. It just seems too convenient for there not to be contractual obligations (a.k.a. money) behind it. Or maybe I'm just underestimating guys here and they really can all play nice.
Scratch that last thought: I just remembered we hadn't discussed Spencer's latest ludicrous stunt yet. Enraged by the outspoken Montag family, who I think deserve special medals of honor for standing up to such a jackass, Spencer set up an all-out attack to get Holly out of his apartment. He even called in reinforcements (namely: Stephanie). "Holly is just the mooch of the century," he whined to She-Pratt at the Karma coffee shop. "I can't imagine disliking a sister more. [Pause] Should make you feel good." Stephanie's blank reaction here was priceless because she couldn't decide whether to be flattered or insulted. She advised Spencer to get Heidi to do the dirty work for him, so that's exactly what he set out to do, only he did so by giving Heidi an totally fake ultimatum just before they headed to brunch — either Holly goes or he does.
(On a random note: What time do you suppose Heidi wakes up in the morning to get ready? Because when she headed out to brunch (which was probably on a Sunday morning), she had full makeup on and her mop of hair was neatly curled. If the MTV budget doesn't include hair or makeup (as I've heard), then honestly, where does she find the time to look so overdone? Listen up, producers: These are the things we should be focusing on! Not lame fights between Spencer and Holly — we want to see Heidi's beauty routine so we can finally understand why the heck she looks like a drag queen half the time.)
Eventually Heidi told Holly that she needed to move out because, according to Spencer, Holly had just been sitting on the couch, doing nothing productive with her days. If he maybe had a job, too, this "issue" wouldn't even be a concern to him. "I can't figure out your life for you," Heidi declared to her big sis. "I don't know how much more to help you while sacrificing my life at the same time." There are hundreds of ways in which I could argue how ridiculous that statement was, but I'm not going to waste any of your time because we all know how much Speidi loves it when we focus all of our attention on their bogus drama.
Until we meet again, TV Watchers, make sure to tune in to MTV this Saturday for two specials (The Hills: The Lost Scenes at 1 p.m. and The Hills: According to Me at 2 p.m.), and let me know what you thought of last night's episode below. What did you think of Audrina's minx-like behavior? How long do you think Corey will last before Audrina goes back to J.B.? Finally, are you at all surprised that Heidi is kicking her sister out?
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