'The Hills': Take a Pass

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At a group dinner that night, J. Bob, who was rocking a very Brandon Walsh-esque hairstyle, tried to remain unaffected when he inquired why Audrina didn't want to stay in a room with him. Hello, two words: hall pass. The hall pass was put into immediate effect when Doug's "presents" (a.k.a. "sleazies") for Brody arrived on premise. Enter a dozen or so energetic young girls. Uh, did Douglas call 1-888-I-Want-To-Go-Wild-On-MTV or something? Or was that line busy and he was forced to ring up 1-800-No-Conversation-Necessary to look for girls? I laughed when Lauren said to Audrina, "Let's go make friends with those girls. It will be so much fun. Come on," because I would've loved to see them even try.

Audrina and J. Bob's tension came to a head when he stole a flower hair tie that Corey had given her. She told him to grow up and walked away. Later, Lauren tried to tell Audrina that it's time to let Justin go if she really wants to pursue a relationship with Corey. But Audrina kept arguing that it's hard and she still loves the brooding bastard. Of course, it's hard, but honestly, what sort of redeeming qualities does JB have other than he can play middle school with you by taking your ponytail holder and refusing to give it back? Unfortunately, from the scenes for next week's episode, it looks like the next Audrina-Justin Bobby cycle of torture — er, I mean love — is about to begin.

On a related note, I wanted to say thank you to TV Watcher Mary for bringing The Bonnie Hunt Show to our attention last week because I want to personally applaud Bonnie for not only attempting to get Speidi to discuss their "unhealthy relationship" on her show, but for sending this message to Audrina (after playing a clip of last week's bikini top strip show): "You can have a young man look at you who is very attracted to you and finds you very sexy, but he can also love and respect the qualities of you as a woman. You don't need just one or the other and I know it's fun to be with this bad boy but please, dear god, choose to grow out of it as fast as you can!"

On that note, folks, I turn the recap over to you. What did you think of Stephanie's new guy? What was up with Brody having such beef with him in the scenes for next week? Do you even care anymore who Audrina dates? Finally, just how many tank tops do you think Doug owns?