TV Recap

'The Hills': Back to you

Audrina's breakup with Justin Bobby is predictably short-lived, but she gives it as much drama as she can, while Brody and Cameron think about duking it out

Yo-yo Ma J. Bobby's got the ability to make Audrina come back to him any time he wants
Yo-yo Ma J. Bobby's got the ability to make Audrina come back to him any time he wants

'The Hills' recap: One step forward...

I'm feeling a bit perplexed, TV Watchers. You see, I can't decide which makes me want to unplug my TV set and chuck it out my fourth-floor window more: (A) Justin Bobby's very existence on the show or (B) Audrina's very existence on the show. Then there's option (C) the screechy voices of those dang hosts from The Hills: Live After Show. Feel free to cast your vote (or even offer your own list) in the message board in the following pages because I really think we could all benefit from a mini griping session about The Hills. After last night's episode — in which the focus was once again on Audrina's doormat ways — I can't think of anything I'd rather do than bitch and moan. (It can actually be cathartic. Go on. Try it.)

The episode seemed to have started off on the right foot, with Audrina admitting to her coworker Chiara that she'd finally realized that Justin Bobby's vicious cycle of heartbreak was getting tiresome. Of course, the minute I saw the episode's title on the screen — "I want you to be with me" — I just knew Audrina's confession was going to somehow wind up being just a giant tease.

Fast-forward to a studio session with "recording artist" Brandy (thanks, subtitle, we would never have known who she was otherwise), where Audrina and Chiara were hard at work doing...well, I don't really know what they were doing there because I'm not even sure what their fake job titles are. Apparently Audrina took the "Heidi Montag Fast Track to Success" course because she's now able to advise music acts on their album cover art. I don't know what's worse: asking Audrina for her opinion, or making an appearance on The Hills in an obvious attempt to gain publicity. Has Brandy really reached a point in her career where she needs an MTV reality show to boost her profile? Guess so. Her new song did make for a nice background soundtrack to Audrina's talk with Justin outside the studio, at least.

Yes, like the sketch ball he is, Justin showed up at the studio to have a "talk" with Audrina. Couldn't he have waited until after she was done with her so-called job before they had their heart-to-heart? I so wish Chiara had dramatically blocked the doorway in a desperate attempt to stop her friend from going down the same pothole-riddled road again. It would've made for much better TV than what actually played out, which was Chiara giving Audrina a tsk-tsk look, and Audrina saying defensively, "I can't keep running from it, I have to talk to him."

Just the night before, Audrina had gone on a date with sweet-as-pie Corey and shrugged off any sort of conversation about Justin Bobby, explaining to Corey that Cabo was basically a "boy's weekend." Then, as soon as J. Bob rolled back into Audrina's life, she was suddenly over the Aussie and back onto (figuratively speaking) Justin Bobby's motorcycle. "I feel like I've just been kind of trying to convince and make myself like someone where, it's like, someone else is still on my mind," Audrina said to J.B. His reply? Oh, it's another one for the Justin Bobby Hall of Fame. "I think we have something special," he said, "I just think that to be in a relationship, you kinda got be, like, together." Quick, TV Watchers, go grab a pen and paper and write that down because it's just so powerful. A relationship involves being together? Who knew?

NEXT: Chivalry is dead

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