'Gossip Girl': Sweet Child of Mine

Happy New Year, TV Watchers. What did you ask Santa for? I wanted Chuck Bass’s uncle to be hot, Little J. to stop hitting levels of Taylor Swift-obnoxiousness, and for Aaron Rose to disappear. Apparently, I was a very good boy this year because I got all of those things. Although, Jenny is still rocking that painful razored cut.

First off, let’s just all praise the wise judgment of the Girl producers to cut dead weight — I mean — Aaron loose. It’s like a big stinky cheese was removed, and now everything smells rosy. Boy, it sure didn’t take Serena long to get over that relationship. She and Dan almost started dry humping in the school hallways. Um, hello, hall monitor! Someone needs to be watching these kids. In any case, I’m kinda already tired of Dan and Serena being back together. They’re like the romantic equivalent of steamed rice — bland, bland, bland. Sure, they’re beautiful but they’re also kinda dullsville. That was a ridiculous moment, too, when Dan was on the phone with Rufus and promised not to tell Serena about the illegitimate child, even though she was standing like three inches from the conversation.

I never thought I’d say this but I was totally digging Jenny last night. I love Nelly Yuki, so any chance she gets to pop back up is reason for celebration. (Confession: I once broke my glasses in middle school and had to wear tape in the middle of them. Yes, Nelly Yuki brought back some sad adolescent memories.) But it was nice to see Jenny finally acting like a teenager, and by that I mean being manipulative and bitchy. Her face-offs with Penelope were priceless, especially when she alerted them that their secrets were out and about to go on Gossip Girl. The mean girls overall were really hilarious, like when Penelope called her father to rat on Jenny for ''bullying'' her. One complaint: Who goes to Pinkberry in the middle of winter? But I love that Jenny thought she was helping Nelly, and the whole time Nelly thought Jenny was attempting to rule the school. Does it make anyone else a little sad that Jenny and Eric seem to have no other friends besides each other? Nelly appeared to be bringing their group to a whopping three people, but then she dropped them like hot hipster potatoes. To be fair, if Jenny showed up at a club dressed in a metallic purple dress, I’d probably opt for the mean girls too.

NEXT: Blair dumps the ladies who lunch