'American Idol' Recap: 'Show me' the Talent

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Also on my list of contestants I expect to flame out during Hollywood Week: Ashley Anderson, whose rendition of ''Footprints in the Sand'' would have been utterly forgettable had she not kept trying to change the lyric to ''Footsteps''; adorable but quite possibly tone-deaf India Morrison (who auditioned with her sister Asia McClain); and hyper Dennis Brigham, who begged, pleaded, and cajoled his way to the next round despite a lackluster take on Chris Brown's ''With You.'' Best exchange of the night came when Kara tried to explain her ''yes'' vote by meekly declaring ''I liked Dennis,'' to which Simon dryly replied, ''That is called being duped.''

It wouldn't be Idol, of course, without a few disastrous auditions, but very few of them stood out tonight. Mia Conley got me chuckling with her post-rejection retort to the judges that ''God's gonna get you. And I'm still gonna be a star.'' Brian Hettler's rendition of Aretha's ''Think'' made me realize what Cher would sound like if her voice were two octaves lower...and she performed on a treadmill. Andrew Lang's rejection broke my heart a little, but only because his two goofy cheerleader gal-pals ended up taking it harder than he did.

But of course, Idol had to go and ruin the love-fest with one truly cringe-worthy segment on Nebraska sandwich-maker Michael Nicewonder, a guy who proved to be a brutally bad singer on a self-penned ditty dedicated to his mother, and even worse on a song he wrote for his grandma. You knew it wasn't going to be pretty when Michael arrived with some kind of band-camp medal and a fortune-cookie insert explaining ''a person with a determined heart frightens problems away,'' and predictably, it all ended in a sobbing, borderline-unwatchable meltdown.

Yeah, I know, no one put a gun to Michael's head and forced him to try to sing on Idol. But if an innocent baby bird made the miscalculation of thinking he could fly, and fell out of his nest during his attempt, would that make it okay for people to kick him around like a Hacky Sack, film the whole horrific incident, then air it on national television? Like I said before, there's enough ugly in the newspaper every morning. Come on now, Idol, let's not let flies get mixed up in that all-important elixir.

What did you guys think of the K.C. auditions? Which, if any, of the new contenders do you see going all the way?