1. Sexual Harassment
Maybe Phil and Oprah — no, Geraldo! — should question the next Supreme Court nominee.
2. He Said, She Said
Hill v. Thomas lasted six days longer than
the gulf war. Next time I want a gas mask.
3. Howell Heflin
Ah say, ah say, doesn't he sound like that
cartoon chicken, Foghorn Leghorn, son?
4. The Long Dong Silver Show
Pee-wee Herman's Saturday-morning
replacement series.
5. ''My Distinguished Colleague'' (''...who might vote for that new dam on my brother-in-law's property if I vote for a useless highway in his god-awful little state.'')
6. Guys Just Don’t Get It
Get what, babe?
7. Nina Totenberg
On National Public Radio, where thousands of
people work for hundreds of listeners.
8. Anchorman Rehash
Stop it. We just watched it too.
9. Orrin Hatch
Proof that parents should not be allowed to name
their children.
10. Roll-Call Vote
Kennedy only showed up because he thought they
said, ''Last call.''
11. FBI Reports
Great birthday presents for your friends in the
press, and they're easy to get.
12. Brand Name Dropping
Coke, McDonald's. What's next? Product
19? Hebrew National franks?
13. 98 Middle-Aged Men
Make that 97. Strom Thurmond hasn't seen
middle age for 30 years.
14. 10-Minute Recesses
...that last for two hours. Congressmen
can't manage their time, they can't manage their money, but they're
in charge.
15. Yale Law School
''The fourth or fifth best law school in the
country. '' And the No. 1 drama school.
