Imagine, if you will, an alternate TV universe — one in which Beverly Hills 90210 never existed. Thus 90210 never begat Melrose Place; thus Grant Show, who plays Melrose's resident slab of brooding beefcake Jake Hanson, would have had to earn his living in the less glamorous precincts of CBS' Coopersmithinstead. Lucky for Show that Coopersmith never made it past its dismal, dopey 1990 pilot, which is now airing in tribute to his newly minted Melrosian celebrity. Lucky for viewers as well: Coopersmith's first and only installment is standard-issue, could-have-been-made-anywhere- with-anyone-anytime-in-the-last-20-years junk.
The pilot casts Show as a daredevil insurance investigator, a leather-jacket-wearing, motorbike-riding, wisecrack-spouting, irresistible rebel of a renegade of a maverick of a rugged individualist; in other words, he's just like every other yawned-over-and-forgotten TV investigator you've ever met, except he's naked from the waist up. That's right: Show peels off his artfully sweat-stained T-shirt early and often in Coopersmith, mostly to allow him to flex what have already become the most overexposed abs, lats, and pecs of the summer. Coopersmith has a twinkle in his eye and a nose for fishy cases, much to the consternation of his boss (James McDonnell), a growly nonhunk who begins every sentence with ''One of these days ... '' but does stay fully dressed at all times.
It's to Show's real credit that he's only half bad in this; in his better moments, his performance has charm and energy. But no actor could bring off C.D. Coopersmith's explanation of his first two initials: ''Cool dude!'' Show's Coopersmith says with a smile. Or is that a grimace?
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