I watch sports and sports. Let me see, do I watch anything else? Sleazy USA suspense movies. It seems like every one of them has Judd Nelson in it, and in each one his hair is longer and more straggly, and he gets more degenerate looking. I'm, like, president of the Judd Nelson fan club. I'll also watch MTV Unplugged and Beavis and Butt-head. Sometimes I watch that show on Fox, 902-whatever. My wife calls it 9,000 White Kids. They're all, like, beautiful and stuff. I like stupid TV like that or Baywatch. You can't believe that David Hasselhoff is a real guy.
I've seen Melrose Place. Yeah, Heather Locklear is a bitch. I don't mean she's a bitch in real life. She was in the movie of my book Firestarter. I remember she had these eyes that you could look at and just get totally lost in. But basically I'm TV illiterate. What people say about books ''I keep meaning to read that'' I say about TV. I keep meaning to watch shows like The X-Files, but I just never get around to it.