BREAKING BAD • AUG. 11 • AMC
''My love for this show and its characters is sincere. It's in my bones. So I'm not going to waste this opportunity by joking around. I want Walter, Hank, and Mike's ghost to run off together and open a bar in the Bahamas, loudly high-fiving and tickling each other the entire time. I want Skylar to legally adopt Jesse, and together they raise Holly correctly as an eagle. Oh, and Saul should totally be disbarred.''
ADAM SCOTT (Parks and Recreation)
''All things come to an end even light can be devoured in black holes, right? but Walter White's epic journey in Breaking Bad should end the nastiest. He should go pro-baddie. He needs to crotch-kick some ballers until Jesse freaks out and, in an effort to save him from himself, kills Walt to become the last man standing. And like any great Western, Jesse walks off into the sunset with a bag of dough.''
ELIZABETH BANKS (The Hunger Games)
''After crawling away and reconstructing his face using Los Pollos Hermanos chicken batter, Gus teams with the Tortoise carrying the severed head, and together they murder Jesse at his 'Yo Bitch' Yogurt for Women shop, while Walt flees to a remote island where he beats cancer, only to be eaten by a shark with cancer. Gus and the Head-Tortoise inherit the car wash, marry, and star in the Breaking Bad spin-off Tortuga and Me.''
CONAN O'BRIEN (Conan)
DEXTER • JUNE 30 • SHOWTIME
''I can't even fathom what's going to happen. I think Dexter has either got to die or they've got to catch him. I'd choose to have Dexter die. He's almost been caught so many times, I kind of like it that way, that he's never been caught.''
ALYSSA MILANO (Mistresses)
''In my opinion, season 4 was the best, pre--dead Rita, when Dexter was still a monster trying to survive in the human world. How should it end? Make him pay or set him free. Either way, Dexter cannot continue, and either way, I care way too much!''
ROSS MATHEWS (Chelsea Lately)
''Before Debra found out it was Dexter, I probably would've said she has to find out that it's him and explore that, or maybe it would be left open-ended. But since that's already part of the series, that can't be a finale. I don't know. Maybe someone chops him up? Maybe he commits a crime, and someone Dexters him.''
EDEN SHER (The Middle)
''My current wish would be for Dexter and Hannah to get back together and have serial-killer babies while Debra decides she will help both of them in their crusade against wrongdoers. But I'm pretty positive that isn't going to happen.''
SHANE WEST (Nikita)