If ''Saturday Night Live'' had ever spun an atrocious movie off its fabled ''Cheeseburgah! Cheeseburgah!'' sketch, it's doubtful the Belushi and Aykroyd characters could have been given an immigrant family any more shrill or cartoonish than the one in My Big Fat Greek Wedding. The film is meant to be an ugly-duckling fairy tale in which Toula (Nia Vardalos), at 30, goes to computer college but still needs permission from her dad (Michael Constantine, speaking in theeck funny Gdeek accent, no?) to stop working at his restaurant, Dancing Zorba's.
Can she get away with marrying Ian (John Corbett), a WASPy vegetarian high school teacher? Their courtship is like something out of a makin'-whoopee comedy from 1962, and that's nothing compared to the wedding, which turns the very concept of ''Greek'' into the sort of hideous, pandering clichés that look rejected from bad Jewish and Italian sitcoms.
Realite: Reality TV justice!
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