Papa Don't Preach

Image credit: Sharon and Ozzy Osbourne: Scott Gries/ImageDirect

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Ozzy then attempted to explain his eclectic -- and decidedly un-metal -- song choices for the ''Osbourne Family Album.'' John Lennon's ''Imagine'' is ''one of the all-time greatest songs,'' he said, while the Kinks' ''You Really Got Me'' is ''the first heavy-metal record'' he ever heard.

Fair enough. But Ozzy went on to say he picked Eric Clapton's ''Wonderful Tonight'' because it's a ''beautiful, lovely song'' that he happened to hear on VH1 recently. And why include the Cars ballad ''Drive''? Well, Ozzy mumbled that he was once in France in the '80s, and ''the French hate the English and the English hate the French... that was the only record that kept us going.'' Hmmm.

Sharon, meanwhile delivered her usual mix of loving words for her kids (''F-- you,'' she told Jack, after he disagreed with her assessment of the drum parts on Ozzy's early albums) and fury at the family's enemies (though no hams were tossed). Asked to respond to Ted Nugent's recent insults (he suggested Ozzy is a burn-out), Sharon was typically restrained. 'I'm gonna cut his dick off,'' she growled ''He probably doesn't have one.'' Too bad the ''Osbourne Family Album'' won't include any of Sharon's spoken-word tracks.