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He may be small, but Kid Rock's 23-year-old sidekick, Joe C., is blowing up. He recently wowed crowds at Woodstock and the MTV Video Music Awards with his...well, we're not really sure what he does. But the short-statured C. -- whose growth was stunted by complications from celiac disease, a digestive disorder -- will start working on his debut album, which he says may or may not be called Enquiring Size Wants to Grow.
-- Rob Brunner
1. What does the C. stand for?
It's just my last name, Calleja. But it also stands for chronic. And chronical, which is chronic. But it's a different word.
2. There's you, Mel C, and Vitamin C. Why is C such a happening letter?
'Cause it involves Joe C. It's all me. This is just the start. It's gonna be chaos, nothing but Cs. You should probably change your name now just to get an early start.
3. Are you related to Mel C?
No, I don't even know the guy.
4. Does Joe C. have any pussycats?
I got a dog, Boo Boo. He bit me in the face three years ago and I got, like, 40 stitches.
5. What exactly is your job?
I just hold it down and get the audience riled up. I'm the hype man. I'm the vertically challenged emcee.
6. People think you can't rap. Can you give me a rhyme to prove them wrong?
Um...let me think: ''Joe C. is chillin'/So f -- - heat miser/I don't drink beer/But bud makes me wiser.''
7. On the Kid Rock album, you say you have a ''high-assed voice like Aaron Neville.'' Aaron Neville?
I like Aaron Neville. I used to like that song he did with Linda Ronstadt, ''Don't Know Much.'' [Sings] ''...but I know I love you, and that may be all I need to know.''
8. Why are little people so hot right now?
Cause of Joe C. and Mini-Me. My boy Verne [J. Troyer], Mini-Me. I gotta give love to him.
9. Chris Rock said some harsh things about you at the MTV awards. How do you respond?
I got nothing but love. But just to let everyone know -- I've said it so many times it's ridiculous -- I'm not a midget, I'm vertically challenged.
F -- - it, if you're a midget, you're a midget. Deal with it. But I'm not a midget, so I don't need to deal with it.
10. Anything else?
I know it's been hammered home a million times, but I'm not a f -- -ing midget. And...actually, no. I don't even care at this point. I've said it so I'm not gonna say it anymore. And I used to be hooked on phonics, but now I'm hooked on chronic. That's about it.
