HAZZARDOUS SITE Forget Graceland. The newest Southern-fried pop-cultural mecca? Cooter's, a shrine to the '80s good-ol'-boy hit Dukes of Hazzard. The Sperryville, Va., museum and store -- owned by actor Ben Jones, who played Cooter the mechanic -- has attracted an estimated 40,000 Dukes devotees since its July 4 opening. Fans of the show (currently in reruns weekdays on TNN) flock to see such relics as original scripts, costumes, and, of course, the 1969 orange Dodge Charger known as the General Lee. They sample treats including Uncle Jesse's apple cider. Some lucky visitors have even gotten in-the-flesh glimpses of former stars Sonny Shroyer (Deputy Enos) and James Best (Roscoe P. Coltrane). And hold on to your overall straps, folks -- Bo Duke himself, John Schneider, appears Oct. 23. ''This is a rather phenomenal thing,'' says Jones. ''The show has great legs. People don't seem to have much interest in prime-time television today. This is the kind of family entertainment people in the heartland are craving.'' -- Susan Karlin

TWIN BILL Want to save a few bucks? If you've already seen Notting Hill with Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant, don't bother with For Love of the Game, with Kevin Costner and Kelly Preston. The bizarre secret: They're the exact same movie. Consider.

-- HILL She's a famous movie star; he's a regular guy who's totally ignorant about movies. GAME He's a famous baseball star; she's a regular girl who's totally ignorant about sports.

-- HILL He pretends to be a journalist; she's the victim of bad press. GAME She's a journalist; he's the victim of bad press.

-- HILL He tracks her down when she gets a job in England. GAME He tracks her down when she gets a job in England.

-- HILL He walks in on her and another man. GAME She walks in on him and another woman.

-- HILL She turns to him during a personal crisis, then leaves him when the going gets tough. GAME He turns to her during a personal crisis, then leaves her when the going gets tough.

-- HILL When boozy strangers bad-mouth her, he objects. GAME When a boozy stranger bad-mouths him, she objects.

ETC. Here's a sign of, well, Armageddon: the baffling influx of Armageddon spoofs. It started with posters for South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (''Cartman: He's doing it for cheesy poofs''). Then there were TNT's Animal Farm ads (''Jessie: She's in it for the freedom''). Now there are the Superstar trailers, where costar Will Ferrell and his gang stride forward in orange jumpsuits. Talk about deep impact. -- Joe Neumaier

[BOX]

MILLENNIAL LIST OF THE WEEK The top five catch-phrases of the last 1,000 years.

5. Show me the money! (Cuba Gooding, Jr.) 4. Et tu, Brute? (Will Shakespeare) 3. Talk to the hand! (Fran Drescher) 2. Do I dare to eat a peach? (T.S. Eliot) 1. Sit on it! (The Fonz)

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random quote

''To lift weights every day was delightful. To not get to eat the things I wanted to eat was a real laugh-fest.'' -- KEVIN SPACEY on what it was like to get in shape for American Beauty


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