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The Fandom Menace is more like it, especially judging by the reams of rabid mail we got in response to our Star Wars: Episode I — The Phantom Menace cover story (#478, March 26, 1999). From the amenable Fandom side: ''I first saw Star Wars when I was 5, and I have been waiting for this day ever since,'' says Justin Joerger of Bethesda, Md. And now, the pretty scary Menace: ''On behalf of the Jedi who protect this planet, I extend our most gracious thanks for your cover of the great Obi-Wan Kenobi,'' writes Jay Wendt of Prairie du Sac, Wis. ''This issue will grace a special spot on my wall so I can look upon it and always be reminded what we are fighting for.'' Sure thing, buddy, just step away from the lightsaber...

Ewan, you lose
Your Star Wars cover story and exclusive photos gave me chills. What a terrific way to pass 30 of the approximately 89,960 minutes until the movie opens (who's counting?). As for speculation about whether or not Episode I can surpass Titanic's $1 billion-plus worldwide box office, I urge George Lucas to get fitted for that King of the World crown at his earliest possible convenience.
Scott Haan
Lafayette, Ind.

Normally, I just don't understand the big fuss some people make over your magazine covers. But never have the words ''suitable for framing'' rung so true. I may have to buy an extra copy...or two.
Amber McGlynn
Lima, N.Y.

You guys truly outdid yourselves, fitting two gods among men into one issue. I finished reading the amazing George Lucas interview only to find an equally amazing Matt Groening interview. You have made this nerd's week. Could you throw something about bikinis in the next issue?
Nathan Staples
Lambertville, Mich.

I'm worried that the new Star Wars movie is being overhyped and overexposed in the eyes of the average fan. Thankfully, I will not have to worry about that with your magazine, since this will be the last time Star Wars will grace your cover — excluding, possibly, the issue that'll hit stands the week it opens, the issue describing how the film will change Hollywood, and the issue of box office winners and losers, not to mention articles on fan reaction, the music, the actors and their characters, the groundbreaking special effects, and how the film will change moviemaking forever. More magazines need to exercise that amount of restraint. After all, the next Episode is just around the corner.
Adam Presti
Milwaukee

Judging by the likes of your March 26 cover, obviously you have failed to realize that not all of us are Star Wars fanatics. In fact, some of us even like movies about things that could, um, actually happen.
Christine Murray
Lancaster, Pa.

Slummer Camp
I'm sure Kato Kaelin is thrilled and relieved now that ex-MTV VJ Jesse Camp has now officially replaced him as the most worthless mammal on this planet.
Adam Felsher
Charlotte, N.C.