1 Agnetha Faltskog
The last A in ABBA wants to relaunch her solo
career. Gnood Lugk.
2 Mick Jagger
He must pay $10,000 a month to support his
Brazilian love child. Darn those disposable Pashmina diapers.
3 Madonna
She's having another baby. If it's anything less than
octuplets, that's the last I want to hear about it.
4 The Rock
The WWF star will appear in the sequel to The Mummy.
The hard part is turning his catchphrase ''the people's elbow''
into hieroglyphs.
5 Stolen Oscars
They were found near a trash bin in L.A. Under
some reels of Bicentennial Man and a bunch of Phantom Menacetie-ins.
6 Kelsey Grammer
The Frasier star plans to play Macbeth on
Broadway. If anyone can wring the laughs out of it, he can.
7 Jennifer Love Hewitt
She stars in The Audrey Hepburn Story.
She'd be over her head in The Valerie Bertinelli Story.
8 'N Sync
Spiky-haired Lance has twisted his ankle. He may have
to be put down.
9 Keely Smith
Louis Prima's 68-year-old ex-wife is out with a new
album of swing music. It's called Jump, Jive, an' Oh My God, My
Hip!
10 Waking the Dead
The memory of a radical girlfriend killed by
terrorists haunts a man running for Congress. A large popcorn
with that?
11 Twinkie Shortage
A teamsters' strike has left store shelves
bare. Aren't the ones we put in the bomb shelter 30 years ago
still fresh?
12 Blockbuster
The video chain wants to start delivering movies
and dinner right to your door. Don't HBO and Domino's do that
already?
13 Britney Spears
She's writing her autobiography. Unlike Madame
Curie and Mother Theresa, she finds the time.
14 Kathie Lee Gifford
She may take over the lead in Annie Get
Your Gun. Beating out Charlton Heston for the role.
15 Alex Trebek
He thinks the questions on Who Wants to Be a
Millionaire are too easy. Like, ''What does Regis do all the way
to the bank?''
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