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Ah, May Sweeps: A time for shameless ratings ploys and pull-out-the-stops network bravado. In other words: It's Fox Appreciation Month! But with so many wacky events to choose from, how do you decide what to watch? Here's a handy chart to guide you through the season-ending oddities.
The Main Event Jesus (CBS, May 14 & 17)
X Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear X Beware: Exploitation of dead people! Stars puppetlike child X Explores complex father-son dynamics X Likely to feature an empty tomb X Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire'
[The Main Event]Take Me Home: The John Denver Story (CBS, April 30)
X [Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear]X [Beware: Exploitation of dead people!] [Stars puppetlike child]X [Explores complex father-son dynamics] [Likely to feature an empty tomb]X [Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire']
[The Main Event]The Dukes of Hazzard: Hazzard in Hollywood (CBS, May 19)
[Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear] [Beware: Exploitation of dead people!] [Stars puppetlike child] [Explores complex father-son dynamics] [Likely to feature an empty tomb]X [Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire']
[The Main Event]Diff'rent Strokes One-Hour Movie (Fox, May 16)
[Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear]X [Beware: Exploitation of dead people!]X [Stars puppetlike child]X [Explores complex father-son dynamics] [Likely to feature an empty tomb]X [Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire']
[The Main Event]Opening the Tombs of the 10,000 Mummies Live: The Search for Egyptian Gold (Fox, May 23)
[Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear]X [Beware: Exploitation of dead people!] [Stars puppetlike child] [Explores complex father-son dynamics]X [Likely to feature an empty tomb]X [Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire']
[The Main Event]The '70s (NBC, April 30-May 1)
X [Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear] [Beware: Exploitation of dead people!] [Stars puppetlike child] [Explores complex father-son dynamics] [Likely to feature an empty tomb]X [Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire']
[The Main Event]Growing Up Brady (NBC, May 21)
X [Filled with dorky hairstyles of yesteryear] [Beware: Exploitation of dead people!] [Stars puppetlike child]X [Explores complex father-son dynamics] [Likely to feature an empty tomb]X [Will be blown away by 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire']
