Merrick (2012)

You know what it's like to reread sentences two or three times because they're so sumptuous they deserve all your attention? Well, you'll read Anne Rice's sentences at least that often — and you'll definitely need to pay full attention — but that's because she writes like someone who learned English centuries ago from a pretentious alien. Rice fans accustomed to her style may tolerate Merrick, a tale of witches and vampires and their codependent relationships, but the rest of us would rather not have to slog through phrases like ''...her breasts were already too fetching.'' Yikes. C