Dear Leo,

6. Off screen, grow up fast.
We understand the temptation of being able to keep company with supermodels, disco the night away in far-flung locales, and fly your buddies along with you, but you're in a position where acting your age means ending up in the tabloids. Invariably, they call you on your behavior, and some of your excuses are downright lame. You got a black eye "walking into a door"? You ditched the Oscars because you "didn't want to take away from" James Cameron's moment? We know you can be more creative than that.

There's nothing wrong with snagging a production assistant job for one of your best friends, as you did while working on Romeo & Juliet, or having your pals accompany you on publicity tours. However, there's a fine line between comforting company and an obnoxious posse. A simple formula: For every bodyguard you need to have in tow, subtract three friends. As Jacks says, "Keep a certain humility about yourself. The ones who haven't, when they fall, they fall hard."

While you're building up a support system, extend it to include an assistant who is not your pal, someone who'll tell you when you're being impossible. Even better, surround yourself with at least two people who can tell you off when you deserve it and won't have to worry that they won't be able to pay the rent.

Of course, the ideal solution is to continue acting like a grown-up even when you don't feel like one. Says Patricia McQueeney, who manages Harrison Ford: "The one thing I've always admired the most about Harrison is his sense of professionalism. He's always on time, he knows his material, he's always prepared." Oh—and one more thing: "Harrison never, ever talks about his personal life." On that note...

7. Be a ''Cheese!'' whiz.
Ah, the press. The paparazzi, the probing journalists, the magazine covers, all feeding off your flesh, your essence, everything that makes you...you. Know what? It's part of the job. We're not suggesting you should be happy about Playgirl's intention to publish nude pictures of you, but fortune and fame do come hand in hand.

Take your Oscar no-show. If you had just made an appearance and presented a prize, you would have completely avoided seeming like a recalcitrant and spoiled star—in fact, you would have been heralded as a good sport. Surely after such a long production and publicity tour for Titanic, you could have endured one more night in order to send a message to your costars and fans that you really like them.

Still, better not to show up than to repeat your performance at the March 2 New York premiere of Mask. What was that, sneaking in a side entrance, fighting to stay out of the limelight? If you're going to stroll down that premiere path, walk the walk, head up, with a movie-star smile on your face. You can be shy back in your hotel room. Or you can choose to stay there.

But you don't have to take all this from us; here's one piece of advice from producer Peter Guber (Donnie Brasco, I Know What You Did Last Summer), a man who knows a thing or two about Hollywood's fickle ways: "If it's not on the page, it's not on the stage. Choose great material, cast a wide net, and have a narrow filter." And if you can figure out how to do that, you're sailing way past us.

(Additional reporting by Judy Brennan)