"I'm not sure I'm up to answering that question." BOB NEWHART, after an audience member asked him what he thought of Viagra, on The View
"Johnnie Cochran says he turned down an offer to be Monica Lewinsky's lawyer. His exact quote was, 'If she wears a beret, I have to say nay.'" CONAN O'BRIEN on Late Night
"President Clinton's approval rating has dropped.... You know what that means. Time for another sex scandal." DAVID LETTERMAN on Late Show
"The [Mir] astronauts and cosmonauts...say despite their political differences they learned the importance of loving your fellow man. Especially when your fellow woman is 200,000 miles away." CRAIG KILBORN on The Daily Show
"Last Sunday Chicago beat Utah 96 to 54. That's not a basketball game. That's like two Spice Girls comparing IQs." JAY LENO, about Game 3 of the NBA Finals, on The Tonight Show
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