Assassins (1996)

As a jaded hitman, Stallone begins the Joel Silver-produced shoot-'em-up Assassins by staring out rain-streaked windows and muttering to himself. Pretty soon, however, Stallone's in full action mode, matching macho moves with rival assassin Banderas, whose grand ambition is to ''retire'' Stallone and prove himself numero uno. Throughout this very noisy cat-and-mouse game, Stallone maintains an unintentionally comical stoicism, but Banderas hams it up enough for the both of them, rolling his eyes and yelling ''Ay-yi-yi!'' Charles Bronson and Jan-Michael Vincent tackled similar material in 1972's The Mechanic, a much leaner, meaner rental than this overblown baloney. C-