''In Hawthorne's version, Hester Prynne did not have access to Nautilus equipment.'' -- Grace (Brett Butler), noting a difference between Demi Moore's The Scarlet Letter and the novel, on Grace Under Fire

''Massimo Troisi [died] shortly after filming Il Postino. Why can't Sylvester Stallone make this sort of commitment?'' -- David Spade on Saturday Night Live

''A congressional candidate in Alabama wants his name to be listed as Nobody. Election officials won't allow it, but they will list it as Lamar Alexander.'' -- Conan O'Brien on Late Night

''You tolerate me, you really tolerate me!'' -- Sean Penn, accepting an Independent Spirit award for his role in Dead Man Walking, on Bravo


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