''Well, you don't want to take the boys on the same day because
the girls shouldn't find out that young that they are going to
get paid less for what they do.''
— Kevin Rooney on Take Our Daughters to Work Day, on Politically
Incorrect
''Unabomber suspect Ted Kaczynski has been taken from his
10-by-12-foot cabin and placed in an 8-by-10-foot cell. We
showed him, huh?''
— Dennis Miller on Dennis Miller Live
''Yesterday a Florida court ruled that exotic dancers must cover
one third of their buttocks. Now, if only they could pass the
same law for the cable guy, we'd be in great shape.''
— Conan O'Brien on Late Night
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