Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead

All overripe tough-guy jargon and stupidly stylized rub-outs, Things To Do In Denver When You're Dead wants to be Tarantinoesque in the very worst way — and it succeeds exactly that way. Early on, Andy Garcia's Jimmy the Saint and his gang bloodily bungle a job, incurring the wrath of the local crime boss (Christopher Walken). After that, it's a long drag downhill as they're marked for death, with Garcia pausing to romance a pretty ski instructor (Gabrielle Anwar), his team sitting around waiting to get whacked, and everyone casually discussing really gross ways to kill people. The presence of the increasingly weird Walken (in a wheelchair yet) confirms this project's midnight-movie aspirations. But if you wait that late to pop it into the VCR you'll quickly fall asleep. C-