Half the fun of the Grammys, or any awards show, is in predicting the winners. The other half is in griping about the results. This is how we think things will (and should) go on March 1 in some of the major categories: RECORD OF THE YEAR ''A Whole New World (Aladdin's Theme),'' Peabo Bryson and Regina Belle ''I Will Always Love You,'' Whitney Houston ''The River of Dreams,'' Billy Joel ''If I Ever Lose My Faith in You,'' Sting ''Harvest Moon,'' Neil Young *Who Will Win: Houston-Grammy voters can't resist a big voice with big sales. *Who should Win: Houston. The song is pop at its slickest, but could you resist it? (Note absence of Miss Janet Jackson, who has been relegated to Best R&B Performance, despite having one of '93's best-selling albums. Nasty.)
ALBUM OF THE YEAR Kamakiriad, Donald Fagen The Bodyguard (soundtrack), Whitney Houston River of Dreams, Billy Joel Automatic for the People, R.E.M. Ten Summoner's Tales, Sting *Who Will Win: This award is based more on artistic merit than Record of the Year is, so it'll be Joel, who flexed his songwriting muscles on River. *Who should Win: R.E.M., for continuing to take the artistic high road after all these years.
SONG OF THE YEAR ''Harvest Moon,'' Neil Young ''I'd Do Anything for Love (But I Won't Do That),'' Jim Steinman ''If I Ever Lose My Faith in You,'' Sting ''The River of Dreams,'' Billy Joel ''A Whole New World (Aladdin's Theme),'' Alan Menken and Tim Rice *Who Will Win: Joel; the ''River'' beat is right off Toto's ''Rosanna,'' '83's Record of the Year. *Who should Win: ''Moon'' is poignant and understated; it doesn't stand a chance.
BEST NEW ARTIST Belly Blind Melon Toni Braxton Digable Planets SWV *Who Will Win: SWV, for being another Vegas-ready, En Vogue-ish group, and selling 2 million records. *Who should Win: Toni Braxton, a genuinely moving and durable talent.
BEST POP VOCAL, FEMALE ''Dreamlover,'' Mariah Carey ''I Don't Know Why,'' Shawn Colvin ''I Will Always Love You,'' Whitney Houston ''Miss Chatelaine,'' k.d. lang ''I Don't Wanna Fight,'' Tina Turner *Who Will Win: No one can oversing a song like Houston. *Who should Win: k.d., for undersinging with alluring wit.
BEST POP VOCAL, MALE ''The Crying Game,'' Boy George ''The River of Dreams,'' Billy Joel ''Don't Take Away My Heaven,'' Aaron Neville ''Have I Told You Lately,'' Rod Stewart ''If I Ever Lose My Faith in You,'' Sting *Who Will Win: Joel, as much for his ''respected veteran'' status as for ''River.'' *Who should Win: Boy George, for his gratifying return from limbo.
TRADITIONAL POP VOCAL Steppin' Out, Tony Bennett Do You Miss New York?, Rosemary Clooney A Touch of Music in the Night, Michael Crawford Love Songs, Diane Schuur Back to Broadway, Barbra Streisand *Who Will Win: Would anyone dare vote against Streisand? *Who should Win: Tony Bennett, for doing his shtick with such undisguised glee.