Butler's defensiveness has been intensified by recent rough experience. Grace Under Fire debuted with a bouquet of critical and popular support, but early on, its star gained a reputation for being demanding, difficult, temperamental. Coming out of the same shop that nurtured the volatile Roseanne, she was seen as another Carsey-Werner diva. (Joining 'em rather than beating 'em, Butler has hung a traffic sign backstage: "Diva Crossing.") In particular, she clashed with executive producer Chuck Lorre, who eventually quit. (He retains "creative consultant" status; Mark Flanagan, a former producer on Love & War, is now uneventfully on board.) Prepared for the stressful work of writing and performing-in addition to doing stand-up, she had worked in Hollywood as a writer for Dolly Parton-she was nevertheless unprepared for the trials of Hollywood's full-court press. "All my hardass-ness had to do with writing," she says: She simply wants her character to sound like the creative artist on whom the producers have built the show, dammit, and is that too much to ask? Butler leans forward, looks to the ceiling for inspiration, and puts it another way: "I know I'm an overwhelming person, but I know I'm not evil, and I know I'm not unfair." And in this she is backed up by her producers as well as by her costar, former SCTV comedian Dave Thomas, who plays Grace's platonic friend Russell. "I look at her and I see someone who has really struggled," he says, "and I respect her for that. I've worked with men who are more picky, but with them it's clash of the titans; when it's women, people go, 'That bitch.'" Marcy Carsey also acknowledges the particular difficulties stand-up comedians have when they have to cede control to others. "It's hard for them to go from being totally self-reliant to relying on a whole staff of people. It's a tough transition. My best advice to Brett has always been, 'You're not alone out there.'"
The woman thrives on doing things her way. Take her breasts, for example. They're new and fake, as she candidly admits. "I always wanted 'em. I was talkin' to my mom, and I said, 'I'm goin' to Hollywood and I'm gettin' boobs!' She said, 'Oh, you wanted 'em for 20 years. At least I can stop hearing you talk about 'em.'" Take her assurance that, if she felt like it, she could pack all this stardom in and go off and write short stories. (She's negotiating a contract with Hyperion for a book about growing up, which, she makes clear, will not simply be a collection of stand-up riffs.) "Before I did the show, every four or five months of my life I thought, 'You have to go down to the Mississippi Delta and teach people how to read,'" she recalls. "'You are not contributing to society, you are on a self-indulgent little rampage called stand-up comedy. Now, go down there and do something.'" ) Take her essence-of-Brett story about a day in the life of her short-lived career on The Hollywood Squares: "Joan Rivers had just lost her husband, she's sittin' there cryin' in between takes, the lights come on and she was, like, showtime! I'm under JM J. Bullock, I'm on top of Bob Eubanks-who's as reprehensible an idiot as the town has ever spewed forth. And John Davidson is tryin' to cut up with me, doin' some put-down stuff. So I'm thinkin', 'Don't even start, pretty boy. I'll nail your house.' And Katey Sagal and Ed O'Neill were on the show in one box, and Katey walked out in the middle of the thing. She was so cool! And I was, like, 'She's sober, she split, I'm not crazy.'" Her "little Scarlett O'Hara experience" taught her something important. "I thought, 'As God is my witness, I will never (return) to Hollywood until there's room for my ass!'" Now there's room. Grace Under Fire continues to gain fans and smooth the production process. "Mark Flanagan is easier to get along with than Chuck was," Thomas reports. And Butler herself is happier, since her seven-year marriage to Ziegler, 34, which was on the ropes last season, is now in better shape; the two commute cross-country regularly to see each other. "If she can get to the point where she gets exactly the support she needs," says Thomas, who has become an off-set friend, "and can relax and enjoy it a little more, she'll have a lot more fun." And when she gets tired? Brett Butler relaxes into a drawl and counts her complicated blessings. "When I think of quittin' comedy and doin' my little altruistic thing I told you about," she says, nodding in her efficient office, "then somebody comes up to me and goes, 'You know, I had a hard damn week at work and I needed to laugh. Thanks.' Then I go, 'Oh!'" Beat. Beat. "And then he says the same thing to a f---in' juggler right after me and I go, 'Where's your taste, in your ass, buddy, huh?'"
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