''I WAS A BIG, HUGE Partridge Family fan. When I was a kid, I tried to kill my dad so my mom would take us out on tour.'' — Paula Poundstone on CNBC's Tom Snyder
''In CASE YOU HADN'T noticed, it does get kind of damp around here. For God's sake, the state flower is mildew!'' — Frasier (Kelsey Grammer) on Seattle's rainy weather, on Frasier
''AFTER JUST ONE WEEK, the Pope's book is number one on the best seller list. I guess it really is who you know.'' — Conan O'Brien on Late Night
''SHE COULD BE GOOD for business. Come on, Jackie, even I'm getting a woody!'' — Roseanne on the Lunch Box's buxom new busperson (Traci Lords), on Roseanne
