Screen Test

6. Step By Step Patrick Duffy and Suzanne Somers dispense banalities to a blended brood of cookie-cutter kids. There was only one Brady Bunch; this is not it.

7.Beavis and Butt-head They may have been exonerated of teaching kids how to set their trailer homes on fire, but B&B are by no means off the hook. As long as these graceless vulgarians aim at the lowest common denominator, their humor is shameless pandering, not genuine satire.

8. Married...With Children Kids have latched onto this show, probably because it embodies everything their parents don't want them to become: profane, promiscuous, and bitter. The caustic humor is awful for children, who should have a bit more life under their belts before they get so world-weary.

9. Sonic the Hedgehog Sonic doesn't know if it wants to be Indiana Jones or Bambi or a commercial for Nintendo. The semi-superhero hedgehog and his sidekicks, including a squirrel with cleavage, are mere fur balls without a shred of charisma.

10. Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman Predictable and politically correct, Quinn harks back to an earlier era: not the Old West but the '50s, when Gunsmoke defined TV excellence. Yes, it has a strong female role model, but that hardly gives this mediocre show license for its aura of pretentiousness. Quinn doesn't deserve to sit so tall in the saddle.

Originally posted Nov 25, 1994 Published in issue #250 Nov 25, 1994 Order article reprints