Hype Said Fred

If you're sick of that derriére de cheval in your office who prances by with his coffee, moaning, ''I'm too sexy for this mug,'' you're in trouble, because he's only the start of it. British dance kings Right Said Fred, creators of the campy No. 1 single, ''I'm Too Sexy,'' kicked off their U.S. dance-club tour by hosting a ''Too Sexy for New York'' contest recently at the HMV record store on Manhattan's Upper East Side.

In a scene somewhere between Club MTV and Studs, the ''Too Sexy for HMV'' dancers lathered up a 1,000-plus crowd for a half hour before Richard and Fred Fairbrass, the brothers who front RSF, emerged to perform (well, lip-synch) their hit single for the masses. Before anyone could hose off, contestants were shaking their tushes on the catwalk by the stage, judged for oversexiness by the brothers bald.

Some unofficial prizes were also readily available. Shirley Alameda, 20, gazed at her muscular fellow contestant Jeffrey Weiss, 30, and declared, ''He's so sexy I can't keep my hands off him!'' A noncompeting couple engaged in long kisses against a pillar, itself covered with fresh lip prints.

So who are the Sexiest People in New York, already? The night belonged to the very young: The title was shared by Laura Sachs, 14, of Manhattan and Ed Reno, 16, of Queens. When asked why a respectable young girl would be found in such a contest, Sachs cheerfully chirped, ''Why not?'' Reno, who exuded a similar confidence, wore wispy blond braids over his forehead (a style he said he copied off a homeless man) and sings with a band called Concrete Enema. A friend, Merry Arena, assessed the 6-foot-4 1/2-inch, 170-pound Reno thusly: ''He's a great dancer.'' Luke Perry, take note.