CAFE ROMEO

CAFE ROMEO Catherine Mary Stewart, Jonathan Crombie (1991, Republic, $89.98, R) With the dubious boast that it follows ''the tradition of St. Elmo's Fire,'' this coming-of-age story about a group of friends at a local cafe doesn't strike even the slightest spark. The plot centers on a dental student-turned- cafe owner (Jonathan Crombie) and the aspiring fashion designer-waitress he loves (Catherine Mary Stewart) but has lost to his mafioso cousin. Trying to be a pithy slice of life, Cafe Romeo careens from bad comedy (in one scene the dental student, dressed in a tooth costume, can't fit through a doorway) to bad drama (the mafioso cousin breaks a man's leg over a debt). In fact, this movie jumps from one unfinished scene to another so abruptly that on video, you may think you've sat on your remote and begun zapping channels accidentally. D- -Jill Rachlin